Creating a space for my son to call his own

It's the first full day of Summer vacation for us since I left work. So far , I have managed to create a personal space for Monsier Nathaniel. I have been slowing piecing together how I would create this space in my head and on Sunday I put the plans into action. I would use items that we already had around the house because they had to be things that were familiar to him. Autism is funny like that, you present something new and it can backfire. We are talking chaos!

Materials used:

• 1 bean bag chair
• 1 yoga mat for texture
• 1  bright colorful kids carpet picked up at  a garage sale
• 1 rack of plastic baskets that connect together. 
• a handful of mismatched socks whose mates have ran away
• a few of his stuffed animals from his toybox
• his favorite balls (textured, smooth, etc)
• a few of his books

I decided on a corner of the living room so that he could be in the same room with me  if I busy on my computer,doing house work, etc. He has these moments where he needs to know I am near him at times. There are times when he just wants to be alone. Although the kid will chase me into bathroom if I disappear for too long. Writing this post though? It took me 2 days to get it posted because every 10 minutes he brought me his tablet and did not "agree" with the episode of Blue's Clues that Amazon Prime was offering.

This new "nook" has allowed him his own corner where he can sit and watch his tablet or play with toys that he loves. He also uses socks for stimming. I am not going to get into the debate about stimming because in our house we do what makes him happy. Happy kid =Sane parents. It works.

I did not spend anything on this project because it involved recycling things we just had laying around. I am notorious for reusing things and I can be extremely frugal. If I can avoid spending money, I usually do.  For example , the yoga mat. We attended a family event where they were giving a free yoga mat to every participant.

This was fun to make and something I had started planning out in my head a few weeks before I knew I would be stay home with the kids full-time.

People are not sure what to say....

As I mentioned before I becoming a stay at home mother as of tomorrow.  The thing is when others find this out their reactions are mixed. I have gotten the ," What will you guys do for money?" to the "I am happy for you and wish I could do the same."  I am not upset at the ones concerned about our financial situation. I mean it is legit. To be quite honest I am scared! I am used to getting up every morning and working. I like having a paycheck . The thing is in my line of work, it's mentally draining.  You see I lost my father in 2010 to a sudden illness. I was not prepared for that , none of us were. I did not do some of the things I had wanted or said what I wanted to. I was forced to look at life from a , "Life is just too short" standpoint.   It really is too short to deal with people who are unhappy on a daily basis. It is not worth it to take time that could be spent raising your children instead of seeing them  on the weekends and an hour or 2 at night.  I grew tired of seeing the disappointment  in my son's eyes when he asked me to have lunch with him and I  couldn't because I had to go into work.  Our autistic son is falling through the cracks of a failing system that is not equipped to handle him because I am not able to spend the time advocating on his behalf. That being said it became tiresome going through that with him and listening to incessant whining of people who have no clue what real pain is because they cannot see past their own selfish needs.

I had to do some soul searching and decide that I needed to do what was best for us and we would manage like we always do. Despite what others think the two of us are working towards bigger goals such as getting our degrees so we can afford a better life for our family. We have a plan and sometimes sacrifices are needed to obtain a goal.

Well Hello There...

Who I am ?

Basically I am a mother of 2 children ,who we affectionately call The Devil Twins...we will get to them in a moment. I got this insane idea in my head that I would leave my job to raise these two because in all honesty it's tough being a working mother and knowing that others are raising your kids. Aside from this it became increasingly difficult to take care of our older so who is special needs. The cost for daycare for a child of his needs is outrageous and in all honesty the conditions in which he was being looked after were terrible. I am a student though and working towards finishing a degree which will hopefully afford me the opportunity to have a better career with flexibility when the time is right. 

The first little monster is now 11 years old  with severe autism and along with other health issues. He's a little sweetheart who likes to give hugs and kisses despite the stereotype. We discovered his Autism when he was 4. My story is becoming pretty common in that he talked a little up until he was 18 minutes and the talking stopped.  I got worried when he was 3 and the speech did not return,  so I contacted Early Childhood Intervention.  These services are usually free. I was glad I did because almost immediately we were set up with a diagnostic team at the local school for special needs. After many evaluations we finally had an answer. This was not my first dance with Autism as I grew up with a sister who is now in her 20's and autistic as well.  I just didn't want it to happen to me and it did. I won't go into the dark side of how I felt and what I went through but over the years I learned what it meant to be strong.  What they don't tell you when your child gets diagnosed is that it is ok to be mad and it's not at all like the movies show.


 The second monster who we refer to as DeeDee Monster is a year younger. He could possibly be a genius but we won't have him tested. We've had enough of testing! Just know that the kid is a science wiz who wants to be a scientist .  My biggest worry is that MENSA is going to come after him or we won't be able to afford his tuition to MIT.  These two are close in age and close in their affections for each other. He looks out for his older brother so it is like over the years their roles were reversed. 

I started this blog so I could share our lives and hopefully inspire some . It doesn't always have to be about Autism but show that life exists outside of Autism .